Disposability
I was scrolling through my feed this morning and came across a post that really resonated with me:
I have been struggling with the same feeling - the desire to be honest, authentic, and raw and the self censoring and monitoring that comes with writing blog content.
Like Andy, some of it is because I see others and their writing feels inspiring to me. It makes me think about or reevaluate something in my life. It has a point of view. And I want to have that sort of impact.
But I know logically that
- I shouldn't measure myself against others
- The others I am comparing myself to have been exercising this muscle for a while, where I haven't
And instead of just doing the thing™ , I get stuck in a loop of overthinking and editing and trying to make things bigger and more important than they need to be, which leads to me not ever doing anything.
I think some of the fear and concern comes from the feeling of permanence around blog posts, where other social media has a more disposable feel to it... Tweets/toots are essentially ephemeral, and with Mastodon you can set your posts up to auto-delete after X days, weeks, whatever. Instagram, Discord... all the various networks I use at least feel more "in the moment" and so there is less of an expectation to have a level of refinement to the content you put out in the world, where blog posts are intentional.. they take time.
I am sitting, writing out a collected set of thoughts. Moving pieces around to make sure that the flow of ideas is somewhat coherent. I was able to take a break, get some coffee, go watch the squirrels in the bird feeder, move more things around because I stopped mid-thought and now parts made no sense... It is the exact opposite of most other social media, and it takes intentional effort to allow yourself to show through. To not sand off all the rough spots and make sure everything is perfectly polished.
there is an unfinished idea that goes here about how a lot of social media engagement happens during other times... waiting in line, watching tv, in the bathroom, and how that leads to engaging on social media to feel disposable and thus freeing. But with blogging you are focused on a task, and it requires attention so you can't do it as the "other thing".
But I don't have much more than that solidified, and I'd rather get something put out in the world instead of waiting to get this one nugget fully refined. If you agree.. disagree.. think I am completely off base - let me know at https://social.lol/@evs
For me - I am just going to write stuff. It may be messy, it might not be interesting or insightful... but that really isn't the goal for me. I'll get there at some point but right now it is more about just doing the thing. Building up consistency with a new habit.
